Lessons from a Crisis Schooling Mom

In this time of great uncertainty during the Covid-19 pandemic people are forced to educate their children from home.  Some are calling this homeschooling, but in reality, this is crisis schooling.  Homeschooling would look much different.  Crisis schooling is what we have been thrown into without a choice and forced to figure it out along the way.  Some may be enjoying it.  Others may be enduring or just getting by.  I think we are somewhere in-between.

Sunny encourages Charlie to get his work done with lots of kisses

Both Tyler and I are considered essential employees at our jobs.  I'm lucky enough to be able to do my job from home, but as a social worker I have the uncertainty of being called out into the community at any time.  Tyler works at Mayo Clinic and is extremely essential as he makes supplies and equipment related to Covid-19 needs.

So while I'm required to put my work hours in from home I also have the additional responsibility of overseeing the boys getting their school work done at the same time.  Three boys all doing different tasks, two who have IEPs (Individual Education Program), and one who needs almost constant prompting and assistance.  Let that sink in for a minute.  There has never been a better example of the expression "being pulled in 6 different directions at once."  Throw in daily meltdowns and numerous motivational speeches and it gets to be a lot.  But here are some things I've learned along the way:

School doesn't need to happen sitting in a chair at the table.  In fact, my boys seem to learn best and focus better if they do their tasks in the weirdest most odd places/positions around the house.  Since this isn't homeschool, we don't have the luxury of learning in different environments.  They are required to do the work the teacher sends them and most of it is through an iPad.

The stairs are the perfect place to get things done

Christian doing his school work while riding his skateboard

It's ok if you don't get ALL the projects done around the house even though you're home.  The first couple weeks I stressed about not being able to get extra things done at home, until I realized that for us, doing extra right now isn't realistic.  We are in survival mode.  Do what you can, when you can.  No one is winning medals at the end of all of this.

Mama, it's ok if you don't have all the answers.  We are in uncharted territory.  We are bound to run into something we have no idea how to handle.

It doesn't hurt a thing if your child needs a small break in between each school task.  Yes, it may take longer to get it done, but we have no where to go anyway.

Sometimes you just need to soak in the sun and feel the grass beneath your feet (well, before it decided to snow again in Minnesota anyway).

Don't worry if you don't teach your kids like their teacher does.  It's not going to torture your child to learn the "old way" of solving math problems if that's the way you know how
to explain it to them.  And it's ok if you, as the parent, don't understand how to solve math using common core....don't worry, no one really does.

Getting our wiggles out in the morning before school work is practically mandatory.  I don't care if it means going for a walk, a bike ride, rock climbing, yoga, jumping jacks or running a few laps around the house, it needs to be done.

Sometimes school comes last and managing mental health and behaviors come first. And don't apologize for making that choice.

It's ok if you don't become a Pinterest mom during all of this.  Some days I call it a victory when all I've accomplished is knowing my kids have been fed (just being real here).

Being silly is a must at our house.

Snuggles and movies are sometimes the remedy to being overwhelmed.  Wine doesn't hurt either.

Naps are acceptable.

Telehealth is not for everyone.  We've maybe had one good session in the last 4 weeks.  I'm not going to push it.

It's ok if the kids have a little more screen time than they normally do.  If that's what brings a little more sanity to your day, then by all means, do it!

Sometimes we need a little help from our friends.

There are no perfect days.  

Don't feel bad if you're not having the time of your life while in quarantine.  It's ok to say this is hard.  Because it is.

We all need to have a little more grace these days.  More grace with each other and with ourselves.  We're all just trying to get by right now.

Charlie doing telehealth with his lead therapist