Transitions With an After-Taste

Think about how many transitions you have in your day.  You wake up, get out of bed and get into the shower, you get out of the shower and get dressed, you leave your house and go to work, you have hundreds of transitions throughout your day and then you need to transition from work to going home, and on and on the transitions go throughout your day.  Most of us don't even think twice about these transitions, we just do them and move on with our day.  

Our son Charlie is 9.  He has autism.  Transitions for him are a big deal.  Huge, really.  Transitions are rarely easy for him.  He needs lots of prep time, social stories, countdowns and lots of patience.  

Last weekend we kicked off our camping season.  We've been camping with our three boys since they were babies.  It's something we all love to do together and have made so many memories.  We started prepping Charlie for our first camping trip a week before we went.  We walked through what day we were leaving and marked it on the calendar, we talked about where we were going, what we would do there and what day we would come home.  

There is always a good dose of nervous excitement for him leading up to leaving. 

The transition home is always a tough one, especially after an extra long weekend of camping.  We can prep him as much as possible, but there is almost always fall out.  Meltdowns and disregulation are inevitable. We've come to expect it. The expecting doesn't make it any easier.  But we've come to know what Charlie needs too. 

Charlie needs time to decompress.  He likes to watch movies or TV for some down time and having Sunny directly involved is a must.  Deep pressure from Sunny helps immensely.  I know it doesn't seem like Sunny would be able to do much to help with a transition, but she does.  She's Charlie's constant and someone he can count on to always be there with no judgements or demands.  Take that constant away and recovery from a transition will be longer and harder to get through, for all of us.  It helps to have his favorite blanket or stuffed animal with him for comfort.  No, not just any blanket or stuffed animal will do, so don't try to switch it out on him and think everything will be ok.  Don't get him to try to warm up to something new, that will just make it worse.  Stick with what he knows and loves.    

A good transition can take several hours and Charlie will be back on track.  A tough transition can take several days or a week to get through with increased meltdowns, behaviors and disregulation in general.  We never know which one he'll experience.  But if we can recognize the signs early enough we can hopefully help him get through it easily.