Sunny's Autism Service Dog Tasks

The most common question we get from people is-  what does Sunny do for Charlie?  Here are the most common tasks Sunny is trained to do for Charlie on a daily basis:

Sleep

Sunny is Charlie's constant through everything.  She goes wherever he goes and is a reminder to him that she is there to help, no matter what.  Charlie didn't start sleeping through the night until after he was 4 years old.  And most of those nights were spent sleeping with mom and dad.  Even to this day, Charlie struggles with sleep, but with Sunny it's more manageable.

Charlie has always felt more secure with deep pressure on his body.  I made his first weighted blanket  for him when he was 3 years old.  He still sleeps with a weighted blanket, but he also utilizes Sunny every night.  Most nights Sunny will take her position right next to or on top of Charlie.  Throughout the night, after Charlie is asleep, Sunny will go back and forth between laying with Charlie and laying on the floor.

Transitions

Transitions are such a hard thing for autism kiddos to do.  We're talking about transitioning from one task to another.  Maybe it's transitioning from the house to the car to go somewhere, or transitioning from home to school or school to home.  It can be transitioning from dinner to the bath tub for a bath.  Or something super simple such as transitioning from upstairs in our house to downstairs to do a different activity.  Transitions are something most people do without even thinking of them, but can be super overwhelming to Charlie.  The more transitions that happen in a short amount of time can be debilitating to him.  Transitions are distracting, overwhelming and can make it hard for him to focus on what is going on.  Since Sunny is Charlie's constant, it helps him to have her by his side to make transitions easier to deal with.  She can help make things go much smoother during transition periods.  Charlie can hold on to her, feel her fur, talk to her and know that he can get through those tougher moments.  In the picture below, Charlie was taking a break with Sunny while at the Mall of America where there were obviously lots of transitions.  

Car Rides

Charlie's threshold on car rides is about an hour.  Much longer than that and we need to plan for breaks.  Before Sunny, we rarely had a trip into Rochester (15 minute drive) without crying and screaming.  We're still not entirely sure what it is about being in the car that he can't handle.  We're thinking it's likely sensory overload for him with the different noises in a small space and the sight of outside passing by him quickly.  Regardless of what it is, Sunny has helped immensely.  She is always positioned right in front of his seat.  She was trained to lay down when the vehicle is in motion, so that is usually where she is, but in the chance that Charlie is having a hard time Sunny sits in front of Charlie and lays her head in his lap.  This gives Charlie a distraction from what's bothering him and it gives him a little bit of deep pressure on his lap to  help calm him.

Deep Pressure Therapy

Deep Pressure Therapy (DPT) is firm pressure applied to the body.  This is often very calming to kids on the Autism spectrum.  And we found Charlie enjoyed deep pressure early on in his life.  This is an important job for Sunny since Charlie utilizes this so often.  Plus, she can do it anywhere we are!  This is partly what helps Charlie calm down and sleep at night when Sunny lays on him in bed. 

The picture directly below- Sunny was using DPT to help Charlie before he became really upset.  It's obviously helping since he has a huge smile on his face.  And the shirt he's wearing?  Yep, that's a compression shirt.  I told you he likes deep pressure!

"Lap" command

The next picture was taken on a day that the transition from school to home did not go well.  You can see we barely got coat and bags off before Charlie needed Sunny for deep pressure.  When Charlie is visibly upset, Sunny knows to go to Charlie but she doesn't necessarily take action on her own.  Tyler or I need to give Sunny a command so she knows what we want her to do.  When we want her to lay on Charlie for DPT we give her the "full on" command.  She knows her job is to lay right on top of him.  If Charlie needs some deep pressure when he's sitting down we give her the "lap" command and she gets part way onto Charlie's lap.  Charlie is able to give her these commands too.  

I just love the look on Sunny's face on this next one.  She looks really proud of herself.  Nailed it!

Socializing

Kids on the Autism Spectrum typically have a hard time socializing with others.  While Charlie is outwardly a pretty talkative kid, he has a hard time connecting and knowing what behavior is socially acceptable around others.  Sometimes he'll do and say some awkward things.  Sunny has been able to be a social buffer for Charlie.  He loves showing her off to people and talking to people about her.  

Block & Cover

Sunny is trained to "block"- stand in front of Charlie when we're in the community to help keep him from walking into traffic or going in an area we don't want him to go.  She is also trained to "cover"- stand behind Charlie to help protect and keep people at a distance from behind.  

Stay Focused

Charlie gets easily distracted.  Sunny helps to keep him focused and on task with what we're doing.  This is especially helpful when we are out in public.  We encourage Charlie to hang on to the handle on Sunny's vest or the small leash attached to her vest when we are walking as it gives him something he needs to do.  This helps Charlie to stay with us when we are walking and not dart off in different directions.  We do NOT tether Charlie to Sunny- this is something we never felt the need to do.  We know some people feel the need to do this with their kids- especially if their kids are runners- and we know some others have strong opinions against it.  We do what works for Charlie.  Yes, sometimes Charlie has been known to run but we don't feel it warrants tethering. 

Charlie is hanging on to the handle on Sunny's vest as we walk through the mall.

Charlie prefers the handle on the vest as it brings him closer to Sunny, but sometimes he'll use the short leash we have attached to her vest for his use.

We constantly need to keep up on Sunny's training and the tasks she's been taught from the beginning.  There have been a couple of things we have seen her slack on if we don't use the tasks enough and in that case we focus on honing those skills again.  She's a smart dog and she takes her job seriously.  She's a different dog when she puts her vest on.  She knows she has a job to do when she's dressed in her vest.  Sunny has been such a blessing to Charlie......and the whole family for that matter.  Life is a little more calmer when she's involved.  

Things Only Autism Parents Think About

There's probably quite a few things we, as an autism family, do that seem completely typical to us, but totally out of the norm for other families.  And we haven't realized these things aren't typical until others have pointed them out to us.  Here are a few points we've learned aren't typical for most families but are vital for ours:

1.  Always on the defense

In our house, we are always on the defense.  We're always waiting for the next "thing" to happen.  The next meltdown, the next dysregulation, the next big fight between brothers, the next night of little sleep, the next transition to prep for, the next something to need intervention.  Tyler and I are rarely completely relaxed at home.  We're often trying to tag team meltdowns while also cooking dinner or simultaneously doing another task.  When we can't tag team, it usually means focusing on the issue at hand while other tasks at home go undone.  If we're not completely exhausted by the time the boys are in bed (which we usually are), then it's time to do those tasks that we couldn't get done earlier- dishes, laundry, picking up or fixing up any aftermath from a meltdown, etc.

2.  Parking

We never thought twice about how we park our vehicle when we're out in the community- Until a few weeks ago when we were talking to Charlie's therapist and describing an outing we had at the Mall of America.  We were talking with her about how hard navigating a parking lot can be with Charlie.  Wherever we go, we always back into the parking space so when we open the doors to get the boys from the back seat, the doors block Charlie from darting out into traffic and the parent blocks the other direction.  We had never considered how unusual that is until that conversation with the therapist who said she had never even had to think of something like that.  To us it was just normal.  We never considered that other people don't strategically park their vehicles.

Now, with all of this being said, Charlie doesn't dart into traffic every time we're out in the community.  Many times he can walk safely holding on to the handle or short leash attached to Sunny's vest.  But it's something we are always hyper vigilant about when we are out in public and walking in parking lots.  Charlie's safety awareness isn't where it should be for a boy his age.  Throw in a meltdown or sensory overload and he won't be thinking of safety at all.  Which makes parking lots one of the scarier places we need to navigate.

3.  House maintenance 

This is something everyone needs to do, right?  Well, of course, but ours is on another level.  Boys can be hard on things in general, but throw Autism into the mix and you have a whole new ball game.  I can't even tell you how many holes in the walls Tyler has had to fix over the years.  And I'm not talking little dings in the walls.  I'm talking holes the size of Tonka trucks in our sheetrock (and honestly a Tonka truck may have actually made one of those holes when it was tossed across the room).  Holes that require replacement sheetrock, taping, mudding and re-painting.  These are holes that are made from toys being thrown during meltdowns or from head-banging during meltdowns.

And I'm glad we are in good standing with Schlage- the lock manufacture, because we have replaced no less than 10 doorknobs in our house.  Speaking of doors, do you want to guess how many doors inside our house have holes in them?  It's a fair amount.  Tyler and I often joke that we need to have steel doors installed.  Not a day goes by that we aren't fixing something around the house.

4.  We know our limits

There's just some things we know won't work for our family.  We know our limits.  We know what will work and what will be a disaster.  Some things we need to try regardless of how we feel it will turn out, but other times we just don't have the energy to tackle something new.  For example, some families can have their kids in multiple sports/activities and run here and there.  We know this will not work for our family.  Transitions are hard for Charlie and we know the more transitions he's required to do means the higher probability of meltdowns and dysregulation.  

Some people are able to travel long distances with their kids.  We know this is really difficult for us.  Charlie's limit right now is about 1.5 hours in the vehicle.  Anything over that amount of time and we need to make a detailed game plan of stops, snacks, breaks, activities, diversions, and rest periods.  Basically, it doesn't take much to reach our limit, but we're constantly working on expanding it. 

5.  Are dates worth it?

Of course Tyler and I love to go out on dates together, but we often need to consider what's going on at our house.  We need to consider that most times we leave we almost always come home to chaos and meltdowns, which is why we rarely go out.  We can't just pay the teenager down the street to come watch the boys for a few hours- it's not that simple for us.  We need people who Charlie trusts and is familiar with, who we trust and who can handle any behaviors that may pop up (and they will, trust me).

6.  Meals         

Of course every parent thinks about feeding their family, but for us Charlie's list of food he will actually eat is small.  He will eat the same thing over and over and over again- day after day.  If anyone of you work at the school during lunch time, you've probably realized he brings the same food. Every. Single. Day.  And that's not for lack of effort on my end.  Getting him to try new foods is tricky.


These thoughts are just scratching the surface.  Autism families live different lives.  What consumes them every day is a different kind of worry than most.  A different kind of worry that people can't fully understand unless they are living it.  But what people can understand is our love for all our boys, how much we love Charlie.  Autism doesn't define him.  He's still our son.  

Pretend Play Isn't Always Easy

Pretend play is often delayed in children on the Autism Spectrum.  Many children will eventually develop this type of play, but I'll be honest, it's taken a lot of practice with Charlie.  A lot of play activities Charlie has enjoyed as he's grown is typically playing on his own, parallel play with other kids, lining up the toys he plays with and playing with the 2 or 3 toys he really enjoys (trains, cars, keys).  And any time pretend play, or make-believe play is tried, it's often not understood and not grasped.

Lining up items was one of the first red flags when he was younger.  Everything was lined up.

Many times when Charlie is lining his toys up, his rigidity shows brightly- his inability to be flexible.  Usually when he has items lined up, there is a rhyme and reason to HOW they are lined up (in his mind).  And if anyone moves them or switches the order, you won't hear the end of it.

I remember this particular night vividly.  This was taken at 12:30am....yep, still wide awake....lining up his trains.

Even his keys are usually lined up and often categorized by shape

I remember so many times, watching therapy sessions or trying to get Charlie to play myself, different pretend play scenarios would be presented and then quickly shot down by Charlie.  Even the simplest of scenarios were never embraced.  Things like, "Charlie, I'm going to use this Lincoln Log as my magic wand."  And Charlie's response, "you can't do that.  It's not a magic wand, it's a Lincoln Log.  You can only build with it."

As Charlie has gotten older, his skills have improved.  And that's not without lots and lots of practice during therapy sessions and practice with mom, dad and brothers.  In the last year we've seen Charlie's ability to pretend play explode.  One therapy session a few weeks ago I was able to sit back and watch what all this practice has accomplished.

Charlie's therapist brought a pretend doctor kit and as you can see, Sunny was the lucky patient.  During this session, Charlie was able to pretend to give Sunny a haircut, some shots, took her temperature and gave her a bandaid for an owie.

These days we'll sometimes find Charlie playing cops and robbers with his brothers.  It's incredible the gains he's made over the years when we sit down and really look back at where he started.  There's a lot of work yet to do, but we sure are proud of how much he's accomplished so far.