Not Your TYPICAL Movie Experience

A couple months back we attempted a movie together as a family at a movie theater and it didn't quite go as we had hoped.  At that movie Charlie barely made it a half an hour into the movie and had a massive meltdown in the lobby of the theater.  I guess it didn't surprise me too much as I had tried taking the boys to movies on my own in the past and I knew Charlie couldn't sit still, but it was the first time we had gone as a family.

I'll call this 'Happy Wrestling'

Today we decided to attempt the movie theater again.  The boys are getting a little stir crazy with this cold weather and we needed to get out of the house.  The boys chose the movie Jumanji and unlike last time, this time we were prepared.  We were armed with many tools to make it a successful trip.  Our tools included Charlie's blankie, noise canceling headphones, a handful of M&Ms, a stop at the concession stand for popcorn and Icee, and of course-Sunny.  We also did a lot of prep talk with Charlie before going to the movie and talked about ways to stay calm or ask for help if he got overwhelmed.

Thankfully no one was sitting directly in front of or behind us- they may not have enjoyed everything we needed to do to get through the movie.  We got settled in, ate some popcorn and the boys enjoyed their Icees.  Before long Charlie started movin' and shakin'.  He was really restless in his seat, turning around and facing backwards, talking, and bouncing around, asking to go sit over there then over here.  I found that continually engaging him about the movie helped keep him interested.  Several times Charlie got down with Sunny and snuggled her (she was laying right in front of him).  It definitely wasn't your typical movie experience, but you know what.....it worked for us.  No one else was disrupted, but we got through it the way we needed to, and sprinkled a little happy Autism along the way.

Unfortunately no pictures from the theater came out clear enough to see.  But Sunny did beautifully as well.

Holidays are Hard

This time of year is always the hardest.  Schedules are different, sleep patterns disrupted, diet....ha, well, might as throw that out the window.  Big gatherings of people, lots of commotion, jetting here and then there, sensory overload and then not knowing what to do with all the emotions that follow.  Holiday times can be hard for any neurotypical person.  Throw in a 5 year old boy with Autism and it can be an intense time.

We have made it through the thick of the holiday this last weekend and now trying to get through a week off of school.  Christmas Eve proved to be the most challenging day with 2 different stops, the transition in between and a late night.  Sunny was an important tool to help Charlie get through. The picture below shows how Sunny puts her head in Charlie's lap during car rides so he can snuggle her to help with the stress of the car ride and transition.  Charlie was having a meltdown during the short 20 minute car ride to the second Christmas gathering of the day and Sunny did her job beautifully.

Having Sunny by his side consistently is the key.  We've noticed Charlie's mood and behavior can stay pretty even when Sunny is with him and within reach.  Having to seek her out can be stressful to him.  Luckily, by the time we reached our next destination Charlie had settled, having had some Sunny time.

Charlie asked Santa for a Fedora this year.  I din't think he could get any cuter...until now.

Christmas morning was a nice relaxing morning.  We weren't rushed and were able to take our time to enjoy each other and open gifts from one another.  The biggest highlight of the morning was the reveal of one of our Christmas gifts to the boys.  A rock climbing wall in our house that they can use any time!  Crazy, right?!

Tyler and I are always looking for different therapy tools for Charlie.  When one of his therapists suggested getting a membership to a local climbing gym to help Charlie with some sensory input, we knew that would be hard to do for our family.  One, climbing memberships are expensive.  Even if Charlie's membership could be paid for through some of his disability funding, the remainder of our family would still need to pay for a membership.  And two, finding time to go to the climbing gym and prepping Charlie for that outing would be a task in itself.  So a few weeks ago Tyler and I started talking about building one in our own house that the boys could use at any time.  Tyler started building the walls and we found some climbing holds that someone local was selling.  An idea was born and we put it into action.  And boy has it been a hit so far!

Tyler adding on some holds Christmas morning

Christian trying it out

The main climbing wall is located in our main living room upstairs and will be extended on both sides of the hallway as well.  There are rules in place to ensure the boys' safety and if they don't follow the rules they will lose their climbing privileges.  So far this hasn't been an issue.  We plan to put a belay system in so we can safely help the boys climb if they want to climb higher.  Their climbing harness came in the mail today.  Yep, we mean business!

Later Christmas day was our last Christmas gathering.  Smaller group, yet still busy.  And by this time in the busy weekend Charlie (and Easton and Christian too!) had about enough.  They just wanted to be home, wanted to try out some of their new gifts and just relax.  Charlie was able to utilize Sunny during this gathering to help be calm.

We spent the rest of the evening on Christmas day back at home.  And between the new climbing wall and the help of Sunny- we were able to divert some meltdowns that could have been catastrophic. Charlie was done for the weekend.  It was clear how much climbing was helping Charlie that evening as he couldn't get enough of it.  He would climb over and over again.  Followed by some deep pressure from Sunny during a movie and Charlie was golden.  

Service Dog work can be exhausting

Now to get through the rest of the week unscathed.  No school and a schedule that still doesn't have the structure of a normal week...we still have our work cut out for us.  

We hope you and your family had a wonderful Christmas and a safe and happy new year!

Haircuts are the Worst

Tonight was the dreaded haircut night at our house.  We've been putting this off for a couple weeks now because it's never easy.  Charlie hates haircuts.  There is no part of a hair cut that Charlie likes.  We usually need to start prepping Charlie a few days before the haircut so he isn't totally thrown off.  However, prepping this time did not help at all.  In fact, when I told him a couple days ago that we were doing haircuts, he was visibly scared and then ruminated about it for several hours.

No matter what we do, Charlie hates haircuts.  He hates the way the clippers sound and feel on his head.  He hates the way the hair feels when it touches his skin.  We've tried haircuts in a salon, with scissors, with clippers, with a cape, without a cape, with towels wrapped around him, with bribes.  No matter what we do we've never had a simple- easy-going haircut.

Our usual go-to plan is quick and simple.  Dad usually needs to hold him or hold his hands while mom buzzes with the clippers as fast as possible.  There's always tears, screaming, squirming and trying to get away.  We can usually get it all done in under 5 minutes.  Nothing fancy, no layers, no styling, just quick and simple.  

Tonight was followed by lots of Sunny snuggles to help recover from such an event.

Bring on the Weekend

This week was one of THOSE weeks.  You know, one of those weeks where one minute things are fine and the next minute you wonder what the heck just happened?  Yep, we had one of them.

The week started out pretty well with a visit to Santa.  There was excitement, there was anticipation, there was fun and there were NO tears.  None.  We'll call that a win in our book.  All of the boys got a moment to talk with Santa, take pictures and joke around.  Sunny even got some love from Santa!  We were just about to grab our coats and leave when Santa got down on the floor to talk with Charlie and greet Sunny.  This is honestly the best Santa ever.  The boys have only ever gone to this Santa and even have pictures with him before they were born!

Santa writing down Easton's wish list before he was born

I know I have a picture of Santa doing the same thing while I was pregnant with the twins, but unfortunately cannot find that picture.  

Everyone is smiling!!

With permission, Santa got to greet Sunny and listen to her Christmas wish list

Kisses before leaving

Although Monday started great, the week had plenty of ups and downs.  Tuesday, something must have been in the air because there were no boys wearing their listening ears which made for a very frustrating night.  Wednesdays are always busy since it's church night and upon leaving church you could tell everyone was tired... especially Charlie.  

Sunny waiting for her boy to be done with large group at church

Well, Thursday arrives (very, very early I might add) with Charlie sick. Poor kiddo stayed home sick from school, got lots of mama snuggles and naps.  Now Friday, and it's been a long day.  Charlie had been feeling better all evening but seemed to think that since he didn't go to school yesterday that he didn't need to go....ever again.  To say our morning was a struggle is a huge understatement. Let's just say there were lots of Sunny snuggles throughout the evening tonight.

It has been so great to see how far Charlie and Sunny have come over the few short months we've had her.  I can't imagine how things will look when they have a rock solid bond.  When we first got Sunny she would only lay in bed with Charlie for a few minutes and would lay at the bottom of his bed.  Now, at bedtime, Sunny jumps into bed with Charlie and immediately lays right on him, without even being told what to do and will stay there with him for a few hours.  She has helped him countless times when we've been out in the community and definitely helps him when he's having meltdowns.  We have witnessed his meltdowns cut in half and have been less intense with Sunny around. He has even gotten to the point where he asks for her if he is feeling more anxious or having a hard time with something.  

Sunny, know that you are loved and very much appreciated.

Sleeping isn't Easy

Most parents expect that they won't get a lot of sleep after they first have a baby.  That's pretty typical for newborns.  Eventually sleep gets a little better as baby gets older, sleeping longer at night and less during the day.  When Christian and Charlie came home from the NICU we had the same expectations that any parent does....you're sleep deprived for awhile.  But I remember the first night Christian slept through the night and Charlie didn't.  I remember thinking "great, we're getting there.  Charlie should do the same any day now."  But days and days went on and he still didn't sleep through the night and his twin brother did.  Many months went by and he still was up several times a night. And as he got older we began getting a little concerned.  

4.  4 years and 4 months old to be exact.  That was when he finally began sleeping through the night.  You want to talk about sleep deprived parents....ha!  It was around that same time that Charlie began using our past family dog to help him sleep.  He would request the dog be with him at night.  And our dog willingly obliged.  They were actually inseparable for the most part.  

These days Sunny takes that spot at night.  Charlie calls for Sunny to join him at bed time and it's always a sweet sight. Sunny usually lays on top of Charlie to help him calm down and fall asleep at night.  Once he's asleep she will move to a different spot of the bed and settle in.  Sometimes she will leave the bed and find a cozy spot on the floor (with all the blankets on the bed she tends to get hot).  There have been a handful of times that Charlie has woken up in the middle of the night and asked for Charlie to be with him again.  It's very evident that she helps him when he has been asking for her.

They are both out cold

But not matter how helpful his dog is, sometimes Charlie still just wants mom.  We try to re-direct him to Sunny, but there are nights that I can't resist and I fall victim to his sweetness.  We snuggle, hold tightly to each other and I can hold on to him just a little bit longer.  Because he won't always want mom.  Sleep still doesn't come easy.  It's still a struggle, but we have hope that maybe it will begin to get a bit easier with age and with Sunny by his side.

"Mom, will you hold my hand?"